Author Topic: Any poets here?  (Read 10992 times)

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Offline hmed2390

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Any poets here?
« on: June 28, 2011, 09:59:12 PM »
Anybody here into poetry and enjoys reading poetry on his or her free time? If so, I have a poem here written by Dana Gioia published in last month's issue of Poetry Magazine and I wanted to see some ratings if possible, on a scale of one to ten; basically, what would you give it and why?

Quote from: Dana Gioia, http://www.poetryfoundation.org/poetrymagazine/poem/241814
Pity the Beautiful
By Dana Gioia

Pity the beautiful,
the dolls, and the dishes,
the babes with big daddies
granting their wishes.

Pity the pretty boys,
the hunks, and Apollos,
the golden lads whom
success always follows.

The hotties, the knock-outs,
the tens out of ten,
the drop-dead gorgeous,
the great leading men.

Pity the faded,
the bloated, the blowsy,
the paunchy Adonis
whose luck’s gone lousy.

Pity the gods,
no longer divine.
Pity the night
the stars lose their shine.

Source: Poetry (May 2011).

A person who won't read has no advantage over one who can't read. -Mark Twain

Offline goldshirt*9

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Re: Any poets here?
« Reply #1 on: July 03, 2011, 07:03:23 AM »
6/10 for me.
ok but doesnt move me  ???

HAD I the heavens' embroidered cloths,
Enwrought with golden and silver light,
The blue and the dim and the dark cloths
Of night and light and the half-light,
I would spread the cloths under your feet:
But I, being poor, have only my dreams;
I have spread my dreams under your feet,
Tread softly because you tread on my dreams

W.B. Yeats

Offline smokester

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Re: Any poets here?
« Reply #2 on: July 03, 2011, 07:22:06 AM »
I used to read portry (as Ern would say) for a brief snapshot of time around my late teens, but never really followed it up much as I was too busy with girls and whatnot. 

I'm still too busy to read anything beyond the back pages of a newspaper, so it will have to wait until I retire.
Don't put off until tomorrow, what you can put off until the day after.

There is an exception to every rule, apart from this one.

Offline subvinorosa

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Re: Any poets here?
« Reply #3 on: July 03, 2011, 11:44:18 AM »
hmed honey, I didn't like the poem much.  I found it too in your face.  I liked the tone of goldie's poem better.

Offline dweez

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Re: Any poets here?
« Reply #4 on: July 03, 2011, 02:25:19 PM »
I'll try to find the poem I wrote for my old girlfriend who later become my ex-wife.  I know I have it somewhere.
--dweez

Offline hmed2390

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Re: Any poets here?
« Reply #5 on: July 04, 2011, 12:08:43 AM »
Oh wow guys, everyone seems to think the same thing about this poem. Interesting, well I'm trying to get some of my poetry published by them for the sake of exposure and possibly have that open some doors to writing in general for me, but anyway, the poem above belongs to Dana Gioia and he's almost always featured in that publication on a monthly(per issue) basis, it's weird. He also co-wrote a poetry college text which I'm currently reading to the side and so far I'm rating it a 6/10 in terms of clarity and dryness of instruction. I just don't see that magic spark in his poetry and neither does anybody else whom I showed his work to; SO - that kind of motivates me to go ahead and submit my work since I feel confident in my ability and well, if he got it then hopefully I can haha(cockiness should be a precursor to success I suppose,no?). So yeah, thanks for the feedback everybody, I really appreciate it.

@Smokes, well, since you're too busy to find poetry to read, you're more than welcome to come read it here; I'm going to keep this thread alive and share some nice poems(subjective) that I come across, - everybody else, please feel more than free to contribute - and that includes any original works by the talented.

@goldshirt, I really like the tone of this one, really nice, thanks.

@dweez, if it doesn't bother you to do so that would be decent.

Thanks everybody and please feel free to contribute.
A person who won't read has no advantage over one who can't read. -Mark Twain

Offline goldshirt*9

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Re: Any poets here?
« Reply #6 on: July 04, 2011, 01:20:09 AM »
When I am an old woman, I shall wear purple
with a red hat that doesn't go, and doesn't suit me.
And I shall spend my pension on brandy and summer gloves
and satin candles, and say we've no money for butter.
I shall sit down on the pavement when I am tired
and gobble up samples in shops and press alarm bells
and run my stick along the public railings
and make up for the sobriety of my youth.
I shall go out in my slippers in the rain
and pick the flowers in other people's gardens
and learn to spit.

You can wear terrible shirts and grow more fat
and eat three pounds of sausages at a go
or only bread and pickles for a week
and hoard pens and pencils and beer nuts and things in boxes.

But now we must have clothes that keep us dry
nd pay our rent and not swear in the street
and set a good example for the children.
We must have friends to dinner and read the papers.
But maybe I ought to practice a little now?
So people who know me are not too shocked and surprised
When suddenly I am old, and start to wear purple.

By Jenny Joseph

Offline subvinorosa

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Re: Any poets here?
« Reply #7 on: July 04, 2011, 05:52:51 AM »
That would be lovely dweez.  I used to write page after page of poetry when I was younger but it seems my Muse has deserted me.

Offline hmed2390

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Re: Any poets here?
« Reply #8 on: July 04, 2011, 02:33:48 PM »
When I am an old woman, I shall wear purple
with a red hat that doesn't go, and doesn't suit me.
And I shall spend my pension on brandy and summer gloves
and satin candles, and say we've no money for butter.
I shall sit down on the pavement when I am tired
and gobble up samples in shops and press alarm bells
and run my stick along the public railings
and make up for the sobriety of my youth.
I shall go out in my slippers in the rain
and pick the flowers in other people's gardens
and learn to spit.

You can wear terrible shirts and grow more fat
and eat three pounds of sausages at a go
or only bread and pickles for a week
and hoard pens and pencils and beer nuts and things in boxes.

But now we must have clothes that keep us dry
nd pay our rent and not swear in the street
and set a good example for the children.
We must have friends to dinner and read the papers.
But maybe I ought to practice a little now?
So people who know me are not too shocked and surprised
When suddenly I am old, and start to wear purple.

By Jenny Joseph

I wonder if anybody in the fora has adopted the color purple yet,hmm..... *ducks for cover*

Seriously though, funny poem, I like it, and it reminds me of a few "young" people I know heh...
That would be lovely dweez.  I used to write page after page of poetry when I was younger but it seems my Muse has deserted me.

As long as it's not awkward or saddening for him,and Sub, you wrote poetry? Why'd you stop? Especially if you were writing it by the pages,sheesh.

Here's to hoping you get your Muse back.
« Last Edit: July 04, 2011, 02:37:18 PM by hmed2390 »
A person who won't read has no advantage over one who can't read. -Mark Twain

Offline hmed2390

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Re: Any poets here?
« Reply #9 on: July 04, 2011, 03:05:36 PM »
I couldn't get the formatting proper on this one so I just screen capped it,it's probably a popular example but I appreciate it nonetheless:

« Last Edit: July 04, 2011, 03:11:07 PM by hmed2390 »
A person who won't read has no advantage over one who can't read. -Mark Twain

Offline dweez

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Re: Any poets here?
« Reply #10 on: July 04, 2011, 04:44:12 PM »
I've looked through all my hdd's that are currently in an active computer I have and haven't found it yet.  I've still got some offline computers I need to check but this has also given me encouragement to do some digital spring cleaning.  I'll keep looking.

It's not awkward at all.  I've worked through the emotions of that relationship a long time ago.  I do hope I find it as I was never much of a "creative" person but felt particularly inspired at the time.
--dweez

Offline subvinorosa

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Re: Any poets here?
« Reply #11 on: July 05, 2011, 02:57:31 AM »
I stopped writing because I didn't feel that I was good enough.  I hated my work.  Then there came a time when my rage and hurt was such that no words could express them. 

I used to have a bag full of memories from previous relationships, both romantic and platonic.  The King made me throw them all away.  I was so desperate to please him that I complied.  I didn't really want to but I wanted to keep the peace.  He felt that I was keeping them because I still had feelings of attachment.  I was keeping them mostly because I'm a pack rat and these were people who helped me become who I was.

Offline smokester

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Re: Any poets here?
« Reply #12 on: July 05, 2011, 07:22:59 AM »
Here is a poem written by my son a couple of years ago, when he was 6.

Grown Food Makes Me Grow.

Here are some reasons - I eat food that is grown
And I didn't quite write this - all on my own
For vitamins I need - like A, K and C
I like to then eat - a small mountain of Peas
But all of my veggies - will give me power
Like Carrots, Cabbage and of course, Cauliflower
I also need metals - like copper and iron
And Spinach is one - that I like to rely on
It is also a source - of vitamin E
And Mushrooms give me - my vitamin D
But we mustn't forget - that all fruit is good
And I eat lots and lots - as all of us should
I like Strawberries, Oranges, Apples and Pears
I even like Gooseberiies - and they're covered in hairs!
But the moral of this - is grown food is a dream
All I need now - is to grow some Ice-Cream!
Don't put off until tomorrow, what you can put off until the day after.

There is an exception to every rule, apart from this one.

Offline subvinorosa

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Re: Any poets here?
« Reply #13 on: July 07, 2011, 05:54:43 AM »
Nice, smokes.  I especially liked the growing ice cream part.

Offline hmed2390

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Re: Any poets here?
« Reply #14 on: July 07, 2011, 02:20:41 PM »
I really like it Smokes. The ending is cute.
A person who won't read has no advantage over one who can't read. -Mark Twain