Roommate had slow internet, so he called the isp, who did something fucky to the modem. He then told me to "fix it". I heard the words "apache web server" when he was on the phone, so I knew we were dealing with class act gnomes at the other end.
I had to to multiple hard resets with a bobby pin, felt like I was in fallout 3 for a minute.
I haven't told him it's back up yet.