Diasfora

General Category => Chaos => Topic started by: Robin-Graves on January 29, 2009, 02:14:55 PM

Title: Worthless Jobs
Post by: Robin-Graves on January 29, 2009, 02:14:55 PM
One of the most  BS jobs in the universe...Abstract Preparer.
Just another useless beurocrat that madeup his job and makes money off of you for no reason.
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: JackFrost on January 29, 2009, 03:28:04 PM
Marketers

Please just kill yourselves.

Thank you.

"Oooo, the anti-market market... that's a good market!" - Bill Hicks
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: Robin-Graves on January 29, 2009, 05:42:10 PM
Insurance and security underwriters.

I know I can do without them.


Oh,, and any position someone may have in the Athletics Commision.
Nothing but useless idiots.
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: MisterAJ on January 30, 2009, 05:54:19 AM
- middle managers

- hairdressers

- telephone sanitizers

 ;)
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: lemmings2 on January 30, 2009, 07:00:48 AM
Road sweepers
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: dweez on January 30, 2009, 07:08:18 AM
Quote
BOB SLYDELL
So what you do is you take the specifications from the customers and
you bring them down to the software engineers?

TOM
That, that's right.

BOB PORTER
Well, then I gotta ask, then why can't the customers just take the
specifications directly to the software people, huh?

TOM
Well, uh, uh, uh, because, uh, engineers are not good at dealing with
customers.

BOB SLYDELL
You physically take the specs from the customer?

TOM
Well, no, my, my secretary does that, or, or the fax.

BOB SLYDELL
Ah.

BOB PORTER
Then you must physically bring them to the software people.

TOM
Well...no. Yeah, I mean, sometimes.

BOB SLYDELL
Well, what would you say? you do here?

TOM
Well, look, I already told you. I deal with the goddamn customers so
the engineers don't have to!! I have people skills!! I am good at
dealing with people!!! Can't you understand that?!? WHAT THE HELL IS
WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?!!!!!!!
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: MisterAJ on January 30, 2009, 07:28:39 AM
^ ROFL
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: Robin-Graves on January 30, 2009, 03:19:04 PM
The North American Athelitics Commision
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: laama on January 30, 2009, 04:50:20 PM
Parliamentarian.
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: Robin-Graves on January 30, 2009, 05:12:34 PM
That stop sign guy at construction sights
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: MisterAJ on January 30, 2009, 06:00:22 PM
The guy supervising the stop sign guy at construction sights  :D
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: JackFrost on January 31, 2009, 01:23:44 AM
Store 'greaters' *shudder*

And Office Space is still genius...
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: Robin-Graves on January 31, 2009, 04:28:01 AM
Toll booth attendants.
And lets not forget high school guidance councelors
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: MisterAJ on January 31, 2009, 04:53:37 AM
Pro wrestlers... (http://s336.photobucket.com/albums/n355/MisterAJ79/smileys/th_innocent.gif)

(http://s336.photobucket.com/albums/n355/MisterAJ79/smileys/th_smiley-tongue-out.gif)
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: Robin-Graves on January 31, 2009, 10:44:46 AM
Yeah,,those useless bastards! I hate,,,,,
waitaminit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: davidsolomon83 on February 01, 2009, 04:30:12 AM
Male nurses  ::) a nurse should be two things, a babe and hot, a male nurse is more or less thought of as odd  :P  :D :D
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: laama on February 01, 2009, 08:47:26 AM
Secretary of secretary.
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: Robin-Graves on February 01, 2009, 11:04:28 AM
Sex Ed teachers.
I know mine was an idiot
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: MisterAJ on February 01, 2009, 11:48:43 AM
Marriage counselor:

(http://img511.imageshack.us/img511/4525/1233468522881aq2.jpg)

 ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: Robin-Graves on February 01, 2009, 01:11:44 PM
Ticket brokers
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: lemmings2 on February 01, 2009, 03:24:12 PM
toilet cleaning  :P
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: Robin-Graves on February 01, 2009, 09:41:36 PM
Mall Cops
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: davidsolomon83 on February 02, 2009, 01:50:45 AM
Mascots for food outlets  :-[
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: Santafer on February 02, 2009, 01:52:33 AM
Ringo Starr. BOOYAH!
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: feelingindifferent on February 02, 2009, 07:03:50 AM
Does being a student count as a poo job?
This is a job in which you pay instead of receive a salary and yet still have such a shitty time.
I'm struggling to find motivation to obtain good grades :(
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: JackFrost on February 02, 2009, 10:29:38 AM
Ringo Starr. BOOYAH!

Wait.

Can we amend frank's little axiom?

Because I can see criticism of George, John and Paul making angels convert, but Ringo?

If that's the case I've converted a lot of angels...

I may have even done it again by quoting Santafer.  :P
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: ohcheap1 on February 02, 2009, 10:39:57 AM
Mascots for food outlets  :-[

I think this is the first truely worthless job posted. But hell, mascots still get paid which is more than I can say for me...........:(
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: Santafer on February 02, 2009, 04:49:24 PM
Wait.

Can we amend frank's little axiom?

Because I can see criticism of George, John and Paul making angels convert, but Ringo?

If that's the case I've converted a lot of angels...

I may have even done it again by quoting Santafer.  :P

I read the words, but I don't understand what you are saying.
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: davidsolomon83 on February 02, 2009, 11:24:55 PM
^ @ Sntfr and JF, i dont get that either  ???
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: Robin-Graves on February 02, 2009, 11:32:34 PM
Mascots for food outlets might be the winner guys
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: MisterAJ on February 03, 2009, 02:11:46 AM
Mascots for food outlets might be the winner guys

Now, are you really sure that those guys beat the musicians who makes a living playing those god awful commercial-jingles..? ;)
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: dweez on February 03, 2009, 07:11:38 AM
I LOVE THE FREECREDITREPORT(DOT)COM BAND!!!!!!!!!
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: Robin-Graves on February 03, 2009, 10:35:58 AM
Floor managers at walmart
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: JackFrost on February 03, 2009, 04:07:04 PM
I read the words, but I don't understand what you are saying.
^ @ Sntfr and JF, i dont get that either  ???

If you look in smokesters signature, he has a quote from frankcapri that says: "Every time someone criticizes a Beatle, an angel converts to Scientology."

I think Ringo should be criticized so I'm asking if there can be a revision on that rule.

Basically, it's a dry joke that failed.
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: lemmings2 on February 06, 2009, 07:54:12 AM
Some more than others ,
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: JackFrost on February 06, 2009, 11:02:09 AM
Some more than others ,

You're trying to tell me something aren't you?  :P
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: dweez on February 06, 2009, 11:23:43 AM
A comment like that?  I'm sure lemming is talking to all of us.
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: dweez on February 06, 2009, 11:43:43 AM
OT:

Leftover wrapper at a Weight Watchers buffet.
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: dweez on February 06, 2009, 12:04:59 PM
I was using OT to stand for "On Topic".  Hehe, but I p.h.ailed.
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: dweez on February 06, 2009, 12:22:46 PM
You're right.  I used it wrong.
/me shrugs..."Oh well"
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: MisterAJ on February 06, 2009, 05:14:28 PM
BOT:

Personal assistant to the vice-director of the agricultural department...
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: Santafer on February 06, 2009, 06:37:40 PM
If you look in smokesters signature, he has a quote from frankcapri that says: "Every time someone criticizes a Beatle, an angel converts to Scientology."

I think Ringo should be criticized so I'm asking if there can be a revision on that rule.

Basically, it's a dry joke that failed.

Ah..yeah kinda failed.

--------



Another worthless jobs. Moderators in internet forums (Here it comes)
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: MisterAJ on February 06, 2009, 08:32:16 PM
(Here it comes)

R O F L M A O
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: MisterAJ on February 06, 2009, 08:56:47 PM
For petes sake.. That's huge and colorful!

Thats what she said!

<ba-dum-dump>
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: Santafer on February 06, 2009, 09:51:51 PM
Thats what she said!

You should look into that. May be a new STD.
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: Robin-Graves on February 06, 2009, 10:25:31 PM
Office worker for the tag agency.
Seems they have 20 people working there,and 18 are on coffee breaks
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: Robin-Graves on February 07, 2009, 01:20:27 AM
A license plate,,where are you from? lol
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: Santafer on February 07, 2009, 01:22:34 AM
Jack Thompson. HIT ME!
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: Robin-Graves on February 07, 2009, 11:08:40 AM
Vice principal of a grade school
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: dweez on February 10, 2009, 08:17:48 AM
Another worthless jobs. Moderators in internet forums (Here it comes)

No retaliation from me.  I can take a joke.  Just to let you know though, my way of taking a joke is to kick you from the chatroom whenever I see you. :D
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: knownassociate on February 10, 2009, 08:24:49 AM
No retaliation from me.  I can take a joke.  Just to let you know though, my way of taking a joke is to kick you from the chatroom whenever I see you. :D
Daaaaaaamn, you guys play rough here.
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: knownassociate on February 10, 2009, 08:26:33 AM
(http://e.deviantart.com/emoticons/e/excited.gif)
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: knownassociate on February 10, 2009, 08:29:45 AM
Heee heeee, I think you're right! Now I shall have to drug test all of my smileys.
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: knownassociate on February 10, 2009, 08:57:34 AM
Nah, that would be too much of an authority thing. The guilty pointing fingers....
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: knownassociate on February 10, 2009, 09:06:28 AM
Damn!!!!
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: MisterAJ on February 10, 2009, 09:07:03 AM
HIT ME!

Uhm... alright... if you insist...

(http://i336.photobucket.com/albums/n355/MisterAJ79/GIFS/t241959627_50613_7.gif?t=1234281673)

(http://i336.photobucket.com/albums/n355/MisterAJ79/GIFS/t325446329_81086_6.gif?t=1234281670)

(http://i336.photobucket.com/albums/n355/MisterAJ79/GIFS/t349870162_37726_6.gif?t=1234281667)

(http://www.clipartof.com/images/free_hosting/large/0180-0902-1010-5513_ongbakfirekick.gif)


Happy now..?
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: dweez on February 10, 2009, 09:08:27 AM
I don't know about you, but it's a good thing I like it rough....   


 :D

This post is full of win
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: knownassociate on February 10, 2009, 09:08:57 AM
Is that what you've been doing this whole time? We were out on a Vilking hunt and you missed out.
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: knownassociate on February 10, 2009, 09:23:50 AM
Your choice.
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: knownassociate on February 10, 2009, 09:26:29 AM
.... ...... ..... and the answer iiiiis....
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: MisterAJ on February 10, 2009, 09:41:02 AM
Daffy duck...


 ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: knownassociate on February 10, 2009, 10:52:46 AM
AJ was the last target, remember? Vikings?
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: Robin-Graves on February 10, 2009, 10:59:37 AM
Damn,,I go out of thispart of the forum for just a little while,,andthis is what happens.
Sexual Harassment!
Ok,,Ill tell you people thismuch,,I DO have a BIG problem with sexual harassment.
There just isnt enough of it to go around! Know what I mean?
There needs to be more of it,,and since this is Chaos,,,I need to start a sexual harassment thread.
Need to,,but not gonnado it,,imtoolazy,,andi figure since I gaveout the idea,,someone will take it and run with it before I could.
And imso DAMNED hungover.
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: knownassociate on February 10, 2009, 11:10:15 AM
Yep, hair of the dog before you get dizzy.
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: MisterAJ on February 10, 2009, 11:10:32 AM
AJ was the last target, remember? Vikings?

 ???

Where exactly did this hunt take place..?
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: knownassociate on February 10, 2009, 11:12:31 AM
On this forum.
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: knownassociate on February 10, 2009, 11:17:06 AM
See? Told you in the ban thread you were off line.
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: MisterAJ on February 10, 2009, 11:38:39 AM
You're both liars... LIARS, I TELLS YOUS!!!
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: knownassociate on February 10, 2009, 11:40:28 AM
^^That's on another forum AJ....
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: knownassociate on February 10, 2009, 11:51:10 AM
(http://www.kolobok.wrg.ru/smiles/he_and_she/girl_devil.gif)
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: MisterAJ on February 10, 2009, 11:53:26 AM
Yes, ple....

I mean, uhm...

Should we mayhaps START a "liar, liar" thread in here..?
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: knownassociate on February 10, 2009, 11:54:32 AM
We've had lots of fun in one before, I bet we could again!
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: MisterAJ on February 10, 2009, 12:08:03 PM
http://www.diasfora.co.uk/index.php?topic=483.0
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: dweez on February 10, 2009, 02:30:17 PM
We need to keep the non-Chaos threads on topic (I know I have my part in this too).  Post bomb forthcoming.
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: knownassociate on February 10, 2009, 02:57:34 PM
Yes, eyes, to the skys I saw the forecast, too.
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: Robin-Graves on February 10, 2009, 03:10:43 PM
Another worthless job,,,,host at a dog show
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: MisterAJ on February 10, 2009, 03:39:57 PM
Worthless:

Phone salesmen...

This Swedish golly called me earlier today...

same number has called me repeatedly for the past two weeks...

So I finally told him:

"If you call me one more time, I'll PERSONALLY track you down like a dog, and RIP your Swedish bless'ed balls of..."
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: MisterAJ on February 10, 2009, 04:08:37 PM
Swedish balls..?  ???
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: knownassociate on February 10, 2009, 04:10:47 PM
I know scared me so much I hung the phone up!!
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: MisterAJ on February 10, 2009, 04:15:12 PM
Can't speak for the general populous, but mine are fine... (bit hairy, though...)
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: MisterAJ on February 10, 2009, 04:46:49 PM
Scissors, maybe...

But sure ain't no razors getting close to my bean bag...
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: Robin-Graves on February 14, 2009, 01:14:51 AM
You mean,,,,,I have to be in a midlife crisis to dress like a biker?
Dammit peeps! I been going through a midlife crises for like,,,,,oh man,,,,23 years!!!
ANd scary thing is imonly 41!
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: Robin-Graves on February 16, 2009, 01:42:42 AM
Its not my fault i look good in leather
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: Robin-Graves on February 16, 2009, 01:29:11 PM
um,,,im strait
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: MisterAJ on February 16, 2009, 02:22:16 PM
Don't look now, but...

Spoiler (hover to show)


 :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: dweez on February 16, 2009, 03:45:20 PM
Unlike wrestling, the bulge is probably fake.

:D
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: MisterAJ on February 16, 2009, 04:15:08 PM
 :D :D :D :D
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: MisterAJ on February 16, 2009, 05:51:24 PM
Worthless:

Phone salesmen...

This Swedish golly called me earlier today...

same number has called me repeatedly for the past two weeks...

So I finally told him:

"If you call me one more time, I'll PERSONALLY track you down like a dog, and RIP your Swedish bless'ed balls of..."

UPDATE:

They stopped calling...







 ;D
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: Robin-Graves on February 16, 2009, 06:25:12 PM
Don't look now, but...

Spoiler (hover to show)


 :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P

Hey hey hey,,,dont get all personal now!
UPDATE:

They stopped calling...







 ;D

But,,thier chicks are kinda cute!
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: Robin-Graves on February 16, 2009, 07:44:56 PM
Dont get dirty now,,,,
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: MisterAJ on February 16, 2009, 10:23:36 PM
But,,thier chicks are kinda cute!

It was just some phone salesman BS, not the Swedish population calling me... ;)

that prick I threatened was just some worker-immigrant... and a GUY... which, I suppose is needless to say, due to the whole ball-ripping part...
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: Santafer on February 16, 2009, 10:33:34 PM
rwar
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: MisterAJ on February 17, 2009, 09:27:31 AM
^ Santa, didn't you get my PM..?

Tried getting that GIF reduced enough to fit as a AVA...

Didn't it work..?
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: ohcheap1 on February 25, 2009, 11:41:42 PM
Dell software IT people
(http://i90.photobucket.com/albums/k246/ohcheap1/vomit.gif)
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: davidsolomon83 on February 25, 2009, 11:44:30 PM
^ Tell me! I HATE them  >:(
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: Robin-Graves on February 26, 2009, 03:08:29 AM
I want to piss on a Dell
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: davidsolomon83 on February 26, 2009, 07:32:09 AM
^ RG, i think people these days dont respect wrestlers like they used to only a few years ago, which is unfair and alomst all of this Dissing is due to McMahon's way of wrestling. I really do not like that guy. I think he has done wrestling a great deal of discredit.
Title: Re: Worthless Jobs
Post by: Robin-Graves on February 26, 2009, 02:16:27 PM
^ RG, i think people these days dont respect wrestlers like they used to only a few years ago, which is unfair and alomst all of this Dissing is due to McMahon's way of wrestling. I really do not like that guy. I think he has done wrestling a great deal of discredit.

I know,,Vince has allbut destroyed the sport.
Like I keeptelling rookies,,forget WWE,,stay in the indies,,thats where the real action is.
After my experiences in WCW, Ill never work for a major company again.
 Besides,,these people that dis me on here dont know me,,or what i actualy do or have done.
Go through training like I have for a few days,,I doubt theyll last 3 hours.
 As for Vince,,,I gave him the finger once.